So you want to be a lawyer

Too funny.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMvARy0lBLE&feature=player_embedded

 

Some of my favorite lines:

 

I want to be a lawyer.  “Why would you do that?”

 

“So you were pre-med and you got a C in organic chemistry?”

 

I love the Constitution.  “if you say it is a living breathing document, I may kill myself.”

 

“Listen, there are like three lawyers in America who argue Constitutional issues.  They all went to Harvard and graduated in the 1970’s. Do you have a time machine to go back to the 1970’s?”

 

The Constitution is so amazing.  “You are going to make me take all my Ambien at the same time.”

 

It must be fascinating to help poor people with their legal problems.  “What is fascinating is that you will be one of these poor people”

 

“Do you plan to get married?  Do you also plan to get divorced?”

 

“Were you aware that you will be spending three years in an environment that in no way, shape, or form, prepares you for anything remotely resembling a law career?”

 

“You realize that all of them are guilty right?  All of them.”

 

What about the guy who was hours away from execution when a DNA test cleared him?   “Science cleared that guy.  A lawyer put his ass in prison.”